Saturday, July 3, 2010
UGH i am so fat, but i'm back.
Ugh. i fucking hate my life. So, a couple of months ago my parents noticed i wasn't eating, and that i was getting really thin. He told my counselor at my school and they did this whole fucked up 'intervention' shit. I was like, fuck you guys. but my friends were all there and they were all 'we love you, please don't do this!" Whatever. i can see now that they were just jealous of how thin i was getting. I was nowhere near dying. i was still 115-117 lbs. Isn't that just how things are though, that all the people that 'love' you can't just let you be happy? Well anyways, back then i couldnt see that and i started crying because i actually thought they were worried about me. whateverrrrrrrrrr fuck that shit. so i start eating normally and i actually had like no problem with it, because i was 'healed' and i 'saw the light' and all that shit. well, a couple of days ago i stumbled across this saved in my 'bookmarks' and i started reading all the blogs- especially my ana idol, Jo! (congrats btw girl! i'm so happy for you!) who can still be with ana, even when she gains a little weight, and is still her friend- and i realized that i am so much happier being pro-ana instead of 'normal.' UGH. it makes me naschious (spelling? haha, lol) just thinking about how FAT i am! well fuck that. I am so much happier in my little ana sancuary with you guys. fuck the haters! i've started my ana again and i am so glad that i turned back to her! i love you, ana! I'll be on the blog more girls, don't worry!